Grief & all that jazz.

Grief is a constant process, I think I am in control then wham, someone or something brings it all to the forefront of my mind.

Often our grief sits at the back, we know it’s there, it’s a constant, but it’s manageable at the back of our minds, it’s not something we have to have right in front of us.

However this is dependent on your grief, for me I do have grief that is constantly right in front of me, the grief for my wife, I have written previously about her condition. She is still alive, but definitely not the same, the grief for the living is different, & I find much harder.

The grief I have for my father, it is there, I miss him terribly, but it’s not right in front of me all the time. There are always reminders, then I will read something or watch something & think dad would love that, then I remember.

It’s confronting at first, I have found I need to feel it, acknowledge the pain I still feel, I most likely will always feel. I was incredibly close to me father, I really am my Father’s Daughter.

I am so similar to my father, this has become much more obvious since he has been gone, when someone says to me you remind me of your father.

To me this is a huge compliment, my father was a very accomplished man, he was a great man, he left a mark where he had been & changed many lives.

This is how I deal with my grief, I remind people of him, that is an honour & something to aspire to, it gives me purpose, instead of dwelling on the pain.



  1. Grief is as deep as your love was (and is) for him, so feeling it all is just a testament of that… I am sure he is so close to you in spirit. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ellpoet says:

      I know he is close to me, I feel it. I just wish I could have a conversation with him. I wish he could see that I have finally done what he always told me I should with my writing, I know he would be proud.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I really understand that.. I would give anything to be able to talk to my Dad in real life, I know its not the same.. He would.. big hug, Elly (( ))

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Ellpoet says:

        Thank you. Stay strong!

        Liked by 1 person

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